The Dilbert Contest
A magazine recently ran a Dilbert Quotes contest. They were looking for people to submit quotes from their real-life Dilbert-comic-strip-type managers. These were voted the top quotes from the managers we work for in corporate America. Interesting read!!
"We know that communication is a problem, but the company is not going to discuss it with the employees."
(Switching supervisor, AT&T Long Lines Division)
My sister passed away and her funeral was scheduled for Monday. When I told my Boss, he said she died on purpose so that I would have to miss work on the busiest day of the year. He then asked if we could change her burial to Friday. He said, "That would be better for me."
(Shipping executive, FTD Florists)
Quote from the Boss: "Teamwork is a lot of people doing what I say."
(Marketing executive, Citrix Corporation)
"No one will believe you solved this problem in one day! We've been working on it for months. Now go act busy for a few weeks and I'll let you know when it's time to tell them."
(R&D supervisor, Minnesota Mining and Manufacturing/3M Corp.)
"Doing it right is no excuse for not meeting the schedule ."
(Plant Manager, Delco Corporation)
"This project is so important we can't let things that are more important interfere with it."
(Advertising/Marketing manager, United Parcel Service)
"E-mail is not to be used to pass on information or data. It should be used only for company business."
(Accounting manager, Electric Boat Company)
"What I need is an exact list of specific unknown problems we might encounter."
(Lykes Lines Shipping)
And the winner is :
"As of tomorrow, employees will only be able to access the building using individual security cards. Pictures will be taken next Wednesday, and employees will receive their cards in two weeks."
( Fred Dales,Microsoft Corp. in Redmond WA)
Labels: Laff Riot
September 08, 2006 6:04 AM
I always like Dilbert (though I hate Adams foray into bilogy a feild he knows nothing of).
This was a great way to start the day :) top
September 08, 2006 9:26 PM
hilarious !!
and i like the template top
September 08, 2006 10:30 PM
@ sakshi : adams was into biology as well :O :O..wat kind of thins is tht ? anyways he is exempted from all sins for creating dilbert :D
@ raghav : thnx dude for the post and fr the template top
September 09, 2006 7:34 AM
Yes i like his quotes n esp one on politics which i don't remember right now..
p.s: the size is ok and post is legible now top
September 10, 2006 11:17 AM
Yeah Adams had gone on and on about God and creation and how evolution was wrong. Had pissed me off.
But Dilbert is cool. top
September 10, 2006 11:03 PM
@ sakshi : sometime ppl just wont understand tht they shud not poke thr nose everywhere..lol top
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