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"Zwicky's Law - "The more irrelevant garbage you put into a sentence, the better it sounds." no more bullshit. read on !!"

i'm a monster :(

Ok I confess!! I am bad with kids. Bad as in real bad. Most of them would plainly refuse to come to me and if sometimes someone comes to me by mistake, the interaction is sure to end up in a saline free flow. For the clarification, by kids I mean teeny-weeny kiddo who needs to be baby talked and who can’t drink milk from glass (ok as it is a confession, I accept, for kids less than 4 years I’m devil personified). Few days back I was at my uncle’s place for 3 days and my kid cousin refused to talk to me. Poor guy started crying every time I tried to hold him. And I sat contemplating and I came up with possible reasons (I know this blog is turning out to be extremely stupid, but whatever!! My kid bro is afraid of me and didn’t talk to me at all. I’m sad)

1) My size/voice: With my 185cm+ and 90kgs+ built I’m like Gulliver for the Lilliputian kids. And for the lazy bastard I am I refuse to shave daily (ok it’s a weekly thing for me) and I get scarier everyday. And my loud voice does the remaining damage to my reputation. I’m like a living monster. I’m like one of those fantasy devils which moms use to scare kids. But then this part is not under my control. Genetic faults, I would say.

2) Cant baby-talk: I claim to be very creative and a blabber-mouth. But when it comes to kids, I can’t talk for more than a second. I’ve realized that my monologue skills are directly proportional to size of the person.

3) Scared of kids: As embarrassed I am to accept it, it is a fact. I’m extremely scared of them especially when they curl in my arms. I think they are fragile and I’ll end up doing some harm. And even more than that, I can’t see a kid crying. My aunt kept on saying, let him cry for a minute but take him out and he will become ok. But no thank-you!! I’m scared of crying babies.

I guess I have to wait for another 3 years before I could properly talk to my bro. But only saving grace is my kid sis who found her new best friend in me. Yaaayyy!! We had so much fun together. And my entire family was, OMG!! A kid with bi2. It’s worth a foto. :D

p.s. happy first birthday Yash!! Love you bro. :)

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  • Blogger Sakshi says so:
    May 30, 2007 3:40 PM  

    I dont think you have to baby talk to the kids. I don't.
    Just fall down to their level when talking with them and let them lead the way!

    And still waiting for photos :P top

  • Blogger Vijeta says so:
    May 30, 2007 10:57 PM  

    u r incorigible Anshul!!!:P top

  • Blogger ~Lord Anshul says so:
    May 30, 2007 11:00 PM  

    @ sakshi : tried it all..but with my size i look like a clown..a scary clown i shud say :(

    @ vijeta : abhi kya kiya maine ??
    ek to apun waise hi tense hai..my kid bro hates me :(( top

  • Blogger Silver Mist says so:
    May 31, 2007 8:38 AM  

    Awwww your bro is afraid of you! HA! :)
    I'm sure you will have loads of company in that department.. It's OK, don't you worry. Things will sort out soon.. top

  • Anonymous Anonymous says so:
    May 31, 2007 11:47 AM  

    @ silver mist : he is not the first one in family..all my cousins were :((

    now its ok, but it feels bad top

  • Blogger Priya says so:
    June 01, 2007 2:05 AM  

    lol... i am terrible with kids too. plus being female, people think there is something strange about me! however, give me a puppy any day, i can converse more with them. :) top

  • Blogger ~Lord Anshul says so:
    June 01, 2007 11:47 PM  

    @ priya : u too..join the club. i cant converse wid pets as well..i told ya..my monologue skills are proportional to size..but exceptions thr too...cant converse wid horses either :P top